I’m down to 100 mg of Lamictal. I feel like shit, but not because of the taper.
I have my period and I have yet to figure out how to get through my period without taking 800 mg of Ibuprofen every 6 hours as well as the maximum dose of Tylenol 4 hours after taking the Ibuprofen. I put the alarm on in the middle of the night because if I sleep through the 6 hour mark I’m in agony. And I’m still in pain in any case.
On top of that I get an adverse reaction to Ibuprofen that makes me spaced out and hardly able to talk. And I generally have my worst “PMS” symptoms the first three days of my period. On days like today I feel thoroughly sorry for myself, so for any of you who have a misguided sense about how wonderfully I handle all my shit, think again.
My trip keeps changing. I have a lot of pressure to go home because both my cats are sick. They got some awful bug while being boarded for the first time of their lives because one is old and needs special treatment. My husband went to Europe while I was away and so the cats too had to leave their home. Now I’ve been worried sick about my cats. My oldest who I’ve had 17 years has kidney disease. I’ve linked her and my brother in my mind since I knew my brother was going to die. I have them linked as two beings that I love that I would lose in short order. So my cat being sick is bringing up stuff about my brother.
I’m also staying in the room where my brother spent his last 4 months. Some of his stuff is still here. I see him everywhere. My last two visits with him before he died was here. So this is plenty of shit to get anyone down, tapering drugs or no.
My mom turns 70 in a couple of weeks and I turn 43. My sister wanted me to stay and to take us out to a fancy brunch in some tower in San Francisco. I don’t want to go home, but I need to go home and take care of the cats. My husband has to leave town on business and I don’t want the cats going back into boarding. I’m not too thrilled about the idea of leaving California at all. I’ve been busy and happy here over all. I feel like I have business here. Family business. People in the withdrawal business and then I also have friends to play with.
But I tapered last night and slept 9 hours. I’d say I’m still doing damn well.