Unfortunately identifying with the term “empath” doesn’t have much to do with actually being skillfully empathic. When one feels another’s pain and calls them toxic, for example, that is the opposite of empathy. It’s also often projection in that one cannot abide similar pain-states of their own and thus avoids them at all cost. This is not always a bad thing. Knowing when to protect oneself and avoid overload is good…blaming the other, however, is not so good. When we own our limitations we can do it without demonizing the other. We are all one or we are not all one. Which is it?
Integrating and flowing with dark stuff (negative conditioning releasing into that which is real, essentially) so that it can come to light isn’t something most people know how to do. When we meet that darkness within ourselves we can then meet it in others at appropriate times and not be repelled. Meeting folks in deep non-judgment is a game changer. (timing is everything).
Related: Empaths, empathy, healing and relationships
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Only in a world where so-called educated men want to control you is awareness seen as problematic :
I spoke with a researcher and physician’s assistant today. A friend of mine and his asked him to talk to me because we have some common interests including the research he’s working on. It was supposed to be a collegial call — my friend thought he would find me interesting too. Anyway…after talking to him for a while he called me a “hyper cognizant patient” … that was some sort of backhanded compliment in his mind as far as I can tell. I’m AWARE OF MY BODY (which is how he defined this newly made up clinical term for me)….but by using such language he made it into a problem.
He told me “hyper cognizant patient’s” overwhelm doctors. He said this in all seriousness like I should feel badly for the MDs. My response was…”Oh, poor things. Yeah, that’s exactly why I don’t go see doctors anymore.”
Oh well. He did actually give me some data that will be helpful as well.
*more on being hyper-sensitive
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In response to an article at Mad in America I made the following comments:
SNRI’s added to the list of psychiatric substances that are hard to withdraw from:…as if this is new information? gosh…I’ve known this for over fifteen years. I am not alone in this knowledge, many of those of us on the front lines of coming off drugs have known this for many years. I never know how I’m supposed receive these shocking “new” scientific discoveries. it seems to erase the work so many of us have been doing for so long to act like this is new information without calling attention to the many thousands who’ve known this well before the medical establishment gave a shit. I go off and hide my tail since all of us have been ignored for so long it’s like we’re not even here. I’m certainly no longer particularly inclined to talk about how many of us are still totally disabled because it’s exhausting and debilitating in ways that make it counterproductive to healing. Anyway…yeah, spread the news to all the people who continue to ignore us…maybe someday that will change too.
Related: Do antidepressants work? And info on withdrawal
**note: sometimes I feel as powerful as I feel helpless other times. I felt somewhat helpless when I first mused about the ridiculousness of academics and scientists thinking they’re onto something brand new when we’ve known some of this stuff for many years. Today I feel powerful BECAUSE I’ve known this stuff for so many years and I continue to heal. As I continue to heal what I know becomes embodied. The body knows things that the intellect can never know, but the intellect can pay attention and learn so much from the body. That continues to be my joyous practice. Whatever we’re feeling is okay. As I feel whatever it is completely it moves through and once that’s done it never arises quite the same again. All things change and as we watch it all change we learn to dance in the unknowable.
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I’ve started to work on self-inquiry that might show me how to drop my personal drama entirely that I might just serve. Clearly everyone is suffering in ways that far exceed the capacity of most folks to even try to see how to overcome it…let alone recognize that all of us are in this painful muck. It’s easier said than done. Once the body gets chronically ill some self-obsession seems necessary. The conundrum is that once we see honestly how much pain everyone is in, everywhere, we also see that it’s far far bigger than what anyone can do…humility is about giving up the personal drama and also any sense of being able to do anything other than meet the moment in front of us…when that involves other human beings, doing it with as much kindness as possible.
Related: More on self-inquiry also: Everyone is mentally ill
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this reads like a soothing balm. i think of ‘path-light’, that which is of potentially universal assistance. thank you, monica.
Hope is an anchor.