The more severe the trauma is the less the pop-culture trauma fad is resonant or safe…be careful out there…a lot of so-called trauma therapists are grossly undertrained and frankly dangerous for the most sensitive and highly traumatized among us.
What happens when you go to an enthusiastic but frankly ignorant trauma oriented helper of some kind? what can happen for the most sensitive that trauma dynamics can be played out with the therapist and they have no idea what’s happening. Retraumatization at the hands of such folks is common. Some of us get lucky but many of us don’t find folks we can work with. This is okay and we need to learn to trust ourselves if that is the case.
this can happen with very well-intentioned therapists and healers etc who simply have no idea how certain kinds of trauma manifest…it’s just the climate right now…some of us are on our own. It’s a bummer but boy do we learn a whole lot once we accept it…and always remain open for the people who are really our allies…they’re out there…it may just take longer to find them…from the outside they can look exactly like anyone else…we need to learn to feel into the energy of folks and trust our bodies intuition about whether we can work with someone or not.
And sadly when it comes to those of us who’ve been psychiatrized even the therapists who are pretty well known and do pretty much know what they’re doing with everyone else, will have problems with us…it’s just the way it is for now. We scare people and as soon as fear is part of a therapeutic container, things will go bad unless we learn to see what is happening and take care of ourselves. Once we can see what is happening we don’t need to continue working with anyone unless we know it’s safe and healing for us.
on a slightly different but related note:
I just realized that the reason I don’t (for the most part) work with healing professionals of any kind unless they are actually my friends is that it does away with the professional veneer. I can’t handle not dealing with my friends/peers because I want REAL. I want intimate.
There are a couple of exceptions in my life…those professionals could be friends in another life/timeline…but not this one…good people though…people I trust and respect and vice versa.
When people hold back big parts of themselves as most professionals do you can’t really feel into their energy and know if it’s a good idea to trust them or not. Hence it’s not.
Observing that professionals hold back and knowing that’s not a good fit for me, is not a conflict…it’s just the way it is. I move on and mostly away from the professional. I discover NATURE and NATURE in the environment EVERYWHERE…being my medicine leading me to that which I really need…not to what I’m told I need from people who do not know or understand my needs.
this is a related video from a while back:
MORE related:
- posts on trauma
- posts on retraumatization with professionals
- more on professionals behaving badly here
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I asked my hospital for help
They sent a psychiatric social worker
My meds were screwed up
I guess I didn’t need to write a journal of my childhood
At 70 years old and with CHF
Recovery is an uphill struggle and it’s good fortune to find the rare therapist who is a genuine ally with the skills applicable to the type of damage you have suffered. There isn’t one where I live.
An ally is a boon. One of the best is a friend to have a cup of tea with. Many therapists are helpful but not very. Some will impede your recovery with junk psychology. There even are some who are actively harmful as exposed by the Wendy Hoffman dirty therapy disclosures.
Trauma informed is a necessary quality in a therapist but in my opinion a years postgrad would be necessary to cover the relevant material, and I ‘m not sure whether there are any post-graduate courses for psychologists to become trauma informed.
I find academically trained therapists to be generally awful and length of time doesn’t improve anything…and in fact sometimes makes matters worse because egoic attachment to what they’ve studied make them dangerous in the dogmatic sense. I actually find massage therapists to be wonderful and some of them are very skilled healers and listeners. I have several friends with who I exchange that sort of work now too. I really don’t do professionals straight up very often anymore.
all that said, I know that a good match is a good match and some of us find that in trained therapists. I have not and I no longer look. If one fell in my lap and was perfect I wouldn’t say no, nowever. ha ha!! it’s true, though.