My healing process is intense and relentless. I hit crises with some regularity and I go into an altered state in which the body knows exactly what to do to take care of it and slowly the body heals. The body does know what it’s doing. Yes. Conditioned mind just needs to get out of… Continue Reading →
We start with ourselves. We make ourselves right or we make ourselves wrong, every day, every week, every month and year of our lives. We feel that we have to be right so that we can feel good. We don’t want to be wrong because then we’ll feel bad. But we could be more compassionate… Continue Reading →
Trauma is not an aberration. It is normal. This needs to be appreciated. The human being uses trauma to evolve and grow and come into awareness. It’s just part of the deal. We are a traumatizing species. …
It boils down to rabbit holes. If it’s not one rabbit hole it will be another. Everyone stuck in a rabbit hole is in the dark. EVERYONE. The entire human species is in agony and trying to heal. There are, however, rabbit holes within rabbit holes. It’s a rough ride for everyone.
Ask yourself, what rabbit hole or holes am I in? …
If you want to beat yourself up when you “slip into old habits” go for it, but I suggest you learn to be kind to yourself instead. When you find that you can do that go for deeply mindful instead of beating yourself up…see what the parts of you that wanted that food or drug… Continue Reading →
These are the status updates and tweets since my trip began in chronological order. I’m swamped and don’t have time to do anything more formal. At some point I will because so much more is happening than what I’m able to share in these limited reflections. *** August 18. (while flying) The amount of stimulation among… Continue Reading →
Waking up and healing the body of autoimmune, chronic illness etcetera – are destructive processes that then require rebuilding of both body & psyche. Healing, as an act of both destruction and creation, requires Kali energy. I was not consciously aware of this when she first entered my life. …
Healing from trauma as well as the waking up process, in general, is often experienced as an unlayering process. Lately I’ve been revisiting the oldest wounding again. It’s been a doozy. It’s got correlates in the body (and shows up as chronic illness via the psych drug damage–everything matters and everything is connected!) and so I’ve not been feeling well either. It’s bringing up all the stuff about the system and healers that played into my even earlier wounding.
My birthday and my seven-year anniversary off of psych drugs was February 9th. I usually do a video and post that day, but I was actually in bed most of the day and didn’t feel well at all…hence the video and post today… At this point I can feel growth in the shittiness too (most of… Continue Reading →
The learning curve involved is no easy thing…this process not a pretty thing either…coming to clarity is a destructive process (so says Adyashanti, here as well). For whatever reason the brain injury created a situation so that the middle path, for me, is a razor’s edge. Off to one side or another it hurts sometimes acutely. Plain and simple.