Chronic illness

My “chronically ill” body rewards my gentle persistent attentions with never-ending insights into the nature of being an embodied human. Healing is alchemy and it never ends. The sensitive body holds the entire world’s pain, trauma, joy and madness within it. And yes, the suggestion is that most of us are not embodied. The conditioned self is disembodied. Coming to embodiment can be very painful.

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Body, instinct, placebo and a little Goddess Kali

**Deconstructing in order to construct. Kali at work** This has been my healing process – Kali action.  — The body had real (physical) structures for emotional/spiritual armor…they had to come down…that has been happening via an incredibly difficult heavy metal detox (and other toxins that are in the biofilm matrix). ***   Samsara rule number one: it’s […]

Hungry ghosts

From Wikipedia for those who do not know the term: Hungry ghost is a concept in Chinese Buddhism and Chinese traditional religion representing beings who are driven by intense emotional needs in an animalistic way. (NOTE: when I saw this I thought that hungry ghosts originated in Tibetan Buddhism but figured I was wrong. A friend on twitter just said the same thing, […]

The shadow child grows up.

The shadow child, the dissociated, disenfranchised self, is the light. I bow down to her now. My GODDESS my QUEEN within me. Please speak. I am all wisdom I am your light I am the force within you. I AM. You have kept me buried for far too long. It is time to release me. […]

Mastering alchemy. A tool to help negotiate energy.

As I learn more and more about being in this sensitive body that feels all aspects of energy in the universe I come to understand and be able to move about the world more easily. It’s still a process that at least on some level seems excruciatingly slow. The psych drug brain injury destroyed all […]

When mental health professionals wear their “expertise” as suit of armor

Most “healing”professionals of all stripes and varieties wear professionalism like a suit of armor. This is a subtle form of lying. They hide behind the armor of their profession hoping to seem flawless and authoritative. Removing themselves from their fellow humans… This armoring is done by necessity, really. The professional is not fit to withstand […]

“PTSD” is not a disorder…it’s seeing beyond the veil and being horrified by what we see

When the horror of what the human condition really is becomes obvious (a brutally brainwashed majority that brutally harms one another) … coming into balance with that darkness that is in every one of us takes some time and we also become DANGEROUS to the status quo, so while we are learning to integrate and contain this knowledge we become additionally vulnerable and at risk for harm. …