The last time I did an anniversary post was 8 years ago. It's my birthday too. I was born on this day. So it's been my anniversary and my birthday for 16 years. I'm drug injured and seriously so. I've never regretted coming off psych drugs.
It seems that a lot of peoples most common trauma response is *freeze*. Americans feel helpless. Learned helplessness might also be considered a trauma freeze response. The first action one must take is to become aware of the potential for freezing. Once you recognize it you can start listening to the freeze and responding to your own body and how it wants/needs to unfreeze. It's critical that we all learn to unfreeze now. Look/feel within and follow your heart. Your heart knows the way out of freeze. Your journey out of freeze will be your own. Trust/feel your body and respond. Get creative. It's within us all. The body is the only way back to humanity.
the last thing to come when one is healing from trauma is a thick skin...it does, finally come, however. it does. really it's not thick at all. it's porous and everything becomes clear and thus it's easier to move around the chaos and muck. clarity doesn't get rid of the muck! ...
I am healing the tardive dyskinesia, which for me, as a result of sustained, long-term mindful attention is clearly an infestation of muliple micro-organisms acting in concert via a highly complex biofilm. ... To call this monster within me a biofilm is highly problematic since most people don’t know what biofilm is and those who do imagine that anything referred to as a film must not be particularly significant. Instead, in truth, it is “biofilm” of some sort that is at the root of all illness. In my experience the TD colonizes every cell in the body, however and is far more complex than what anyone seems to understand. In tardive dyskinesia, these systems of micro-organism architecture that are being organized becomes a snaking, moving, morphing entity that slowly takes over the entire body. It defies the laws of physics as we currently understand them.
I'm starting to share responses to general trends I'm reading in social media. I don't partake much in social media anymore. Not like I used to, but I am still ghosting around and seeing what is happening on the front lines of thought in critical psych and social justice. Below are some of the responses I've had to common themes that I felt like sharing.
Discrimination against those with DSM labels in the health professions. Health care providers discriminate. Yes, this is generally true among mental health professionals as well as health professionals and healers in general. It’s true among psychiatrists and therapists, and social workers too. It’s true among those who are part of the medical model and it’s true of those who are critical of psychiatric drugs as well. Discrimination in mental health professionals runs the entire spectrum of care.
Narrative and story are tools of interpretation. They do not and cannot represent absolute truth. Within the evolving persons life a narrative can change many times. Alternately one might apply a multitude of narratives to a single issue so that in effect one can see themselves simultaneously through many prisms/perspectives and thus have a more holistic and profound understanding of their experience. Imposing our narrative on another is violence, just as having a narrative imposed upon us can be.
we are being called to radical alchemy. the marriage of opposites…healing requires bringing together a great diversity of all aspects of our lives.
mmm... raw smoothie time ...I just made an incredible smoothie/cold soup sorta drink. It's odd, but when it gets cold at this time of year, I need these sorts of raw fruit and veg smoothies. In general cooked food is better for me, across the board...but there are periods of time in which I do a lot or all raw for brief periods. Right now this is just my lunch today. I had a pure carnivore breakfast. The infections have ruined my gut and it's often easier and better for my gut to do mono meals. ....
As someone who has utilized mindfulness as the cornerstone of my own healing process I have to say that what is wrong with most pop treatments of meditation in general is that they fail to warn the reality. It's taken years of profound mindfulness practice that has demanded going deep into the darkest parts of the human psyche...in this process I've learned how to listen to my body and follow my own guidance. I've learned to shut out all the multiple conditioned voices of our ugly capitalistic system and come back to myself. ... What they don't tell you is that mindfulness in process...deep profound, honest mindfulness can alienate and isolate while on the way to well-being.
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