I am not inspired to write today but get uncomfortable about not updating my blog, so I will give a brief update on my brother drama. First, I began to feel much, much better two days into my period. My PMS is lasting about 16 days. It starts at ovulation and goes until the second... Continue Reading →
The Roller Coaster that is my Life
Shit. Sometimes I just don't know how I'm going to continue down this road. Sometimes I feel so disheartened. The situation with my brother just keeps deteriorating and it won't stop until he's dead. I don't know if trying to continue my withdrawals during this period makes sense, but it's already going to take a... Continue Reading →
My Trip
I leave this early evening for California. I'm okay. My dark mood has lifted. I don't think I have to worry about a constant ugly depression just yet. I awoke at 2:30 am as I'm worried about my trip. I will be up 24 hours before I am able to go to bed in CA.... Continue Reading →
More Complications
I'm not doing well. It could be said I'm having a complicated depression or a complicated grieving process. Ruth at Off LabelArchives of General Psychiatry that argues that grieving and loss should not be labeled depression unless they are "complicated". She summarizes and comments: discusses the study from the 'Complicated' episodes, whether triggered by bereavement... Continue Reading →
Grief
I am grieving. I feel like shit. Last night I told my husband I wanted to give up. I don't know what that actually means. How does one give up while still living, except by suicide, which is not what I was talking about. But my grief is making me feel awful and what with... Continue Reading →
Bad News–More Struggling with Negative Emotion
Last night I got additional bad news about my brother. I've mentioned before that he has cancer. I told you that I fear a meltdown at his loss. I already have mini meltdowns each time I hear some bad news. His fate is hanging over my head all the time. I try to shove it... Continue Reading →