I did not need to take anything to take the edge of my nervous system’s distress last night. If the Lamictal taper continues in this manner and I need to take out “the big gun” only once per taper that will be grand. I don’t see why it should get any worse. I’m proud of myself and my flexibility. While I had a moment of panic last night, I ended up relaxing and going to bed earlier than I had in a long time and falling asleep immediately all without assistance. What is most amazing to me is how incredibly awful the day before was. I don’t think undue masochism is warranted. Like I said “Skillful Means.” I’m okay now and no nearer to Klonopin abuse than before.
I’m imagining readers passing judgment because sometimes people in the withdrawal community really are masochistic. I once suggested someone reinstate a small amount of what they were withdrawing from in an email group and got shock from the person withdrawing and a disapproving silence from everyone else. I’ve now reinstated small amounts (much smaller amounts than what I had tapered total in a short period of time) twice now. It makes sense. There are times when withdrawal suffering crosses over into masochism. Go easy on yourself. And, God knows, I’m not talking no suffering here. Intermittently I suffer horribly and there is no avoiding that. But trust yourself when that suffering crosses a line. I have not once taken a step backwards by doing kind things for myself.