the missing mother
I was born into a home that was in grief.
Another mother had died.
We all loved her with agonizing Purity…
the missing mother – a poem
The awakened heart is a broken heart
There’s grief in awakening. Grief at the loss of autonomy, grief at the loss of purpose and meaning. Grief at the loss of knowing and certainty, however deluded they were. There’s grief over losing one’s power, and one’s familiar identity. There’s so much loss in awakening. When it dawns that there’s nothing we can keep, nothing can be retained beyond its prescribed time, and all that we know and love must pass, then a natural grief for all of it can come. And since this knowledge of loss is for all of it, for all time, then that ache of grief is an ever-present refrain, a broken heart, amidst the delight at the miracle and mystery of life. …
Everything matters: Beyond Meds ~ navigation menus etc.
The URL everyone knows and loves is back. Here is an updated navigation menu for saving and/or sharing. Navigating close to 6,000 posts gets complicated!
We are a sensitive species who have forgotten who we are
We are by nature a sensitive species. Every last one of us. We learn through cultural conditioning to ignore and shut down what would be our highly sensitive natures — our birthright. The conditioning we learn from our parents and our community (and the TV and internet and mass media) further encourages additional habits that appeal to us in particular. School furthers the conditioning. Later we develop more habits to reinforce the conditioning and keep ourselves numb. We use food (highly processed and toxic and developed to encourage craving), drugs (both legal and illegal), alcohol, video games, porn, TV, internet, shopping and the pursuit of more, more, more stuff to keep ourselves numb to the lies we’ve been told since the day we popped out of the womb. … [click on title for the rest of the post]
Learning to live again…
This is a little collection of thoughts I’ve written down in the last month and a half or so. I’m still getting a grip on what happened and these are some of my musings. My best to all who visit here today and always.
Marketing happiness
We can hold the horror and the wonder of life at once…it’s a more mature and complex stance than simple happiness. It’s sober and holds wondrousness and beauty right alongside heinousness and pain. …
The Trauma that Blinds Us
Trauma can be like a repeating record, a time-loop, circulating through another kind of time. The same octave notes keep repeating, said one writer, until they get heard. Yet many trauma therapies come short in matching the compulsive sense of truth that can be the perfume of most traumatic experiences. …
Mourning, loss and vision
This will aways be in my heart: that people will be offered meaningful options to toxic psychiatry and that a kaleidoscopic infrastructure of care will rise up as a result of our holding this vision and passing it on. Multiple options are offered that change as people grow and change. Healing is not stagnant…what we need changes daily and by the minute. That the system will be fluid and alive, growing and changing just like those who need healing within it. That the “system” will actually be the village. Real egalitarian community…a world in which every human being is equal to every other human being. …
Terror and grief
Hello, terror, my old friend… I was born into a home filled with terror and grief. Terror and grief, thus, became the most familiar thing in my reality. (this terror and grief was largely unconscious and unspoken, so uncovering it took the willingness to honestly look at what was really there) And to be clear: we are all born into a world filled with terror and grief. …
Beyond withdrawal…
I see in retrospect that some core, vital part of me was always there during the drugged years, learning and remembering much that would help me in these years of coming off meds and now being med free. I no longer believe that I “lost” my life to drugs. This is, as Mary Oliver, puts it, my “one wild and precious life.”
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