The new psychiatrist

I’ve mentioned my new psychiatrist, the orthomolecular one. While I’m quite optimistic with what orthomolecular can do, having had email correspondence with many people who have used it successfully and I too having pulled together a plan on my own that has helped matters a lot, I’m still skeptical about the doctor I’ve found. Finding psychiatrists or other practitioners that understand natural medicine is like finding a needle in a haystack. Someone in my alternative mental health email group turned me on to this doctor.

Her office is four hours from my house. It’s a schlep. But I’ve been very happy that I could get some unusual blood work done and I do hope that what I discovered in my blood work will help take care of the PMS (PMDD?) as she promised.

I’ve made reference to it before, but I think it bares repeating. Every hospitalization I’ve ever had was in conjunction with my pre-menstrual phase. It seems I was diagnosed bipolar for having taken hallucinogenics while premenstrual. All my symptoms are at a minimum now and I’m withdrawing from meds slowly and steadily with no ill-effect, but I’m still not happy with how I feel pre-menstrually. It gets damn rocky there for a couple of weeks.

So I was happy to find a doctor in proximity to me. I still see my local doctor for prescriptions.

The catch here is that I’ve discovered that my natural, holistic doctor is still a bitch ala MHPPD. She shows little empathy and displayed an ugly moment when she snapped at me when I made a mere suggestion that I might not be able to follow one of her advisements to the letter. She is dogmatic about her belief system and leaves me feeling if I don’t follow every one of her recommendations she will be disapproving. I’m scared of her as I have that people-pleasing problem with people in authority–something that served me very badly in the use of psychiatry historically. She is no different from a typical traditional psychiatrist in the way she displays arrogance and certainty in her methods. I guess I wasn’t totally surprised, but I was disappointed.

She snapped at me on the phone, not in her office, (as I do phone appointments with her because of the distance) and it stung so bad that I regressed back to the times I spent in the hospital 20 years ago. I was trusting her with something that made me feel vulnerable. You may laugh and please do, but I went directly to thememoryartist’s post on MHPPD–she really has the types of MHP’s down to a letter and so in typical DSM fashion I was quickly able to diagnose my doctor. (narcissistic)

I still need her expertise and can’t shop around for someone better, as I need someone to order continuing blood work –someone who knows how to interpret the results. So now I have to simply be careful in what I say. Show no emotion or vulnerability and simply use her for her expertise. The tricky part is how do I pick and choose what I want to try and not piss her off for not doing everything she suggests? I have done research and I simply don’t feel inclined to follow every suggestion she has made. And I also can’t afford everything either.

If I don’t get results in the next couple of months, I’ll move on. I’ve muddled my way through the nutritional challenges quite nicely on my own with the help of the internet and people on it. Of course if she proves helpful, I’ll be grateful, but never for her personality.

About Monica Cassani

Author/Editor Beyond Meds: Everything Matters

10 Responses

  1. thememoryartist

    “The tricky part is how do I pick and choose what I want to try and not piss her off for not doing everything she suggests?”

    You probably won’t be able to do that. The tricky part really, is letting her deal with her own disturbance, while knowing that it is your health, your life, your choice and your money. Your entire relationship with her is about you, not her need to be obeyed without question. That’s her issue. She’ll just have to deal.I’m sure there is no shortage of patients willing to stroke her ego.You might feel very empowered by refusing to do so. I know it’s hard, but you’re reacting out of an old fear of psychiatrists I think. This woman can’t do anything to you. She works for YOU.Wouldn’t she be surprised if she were reminded of that in some very subtle ways when she starts with her pushy authoritarian b.s. What’s the worst she can do? You might feel like you really want her approval, but ultimately you really only need her medical expertise in this area. She needs to get a grip.

    Now that she has been properly diagnosed, you will know when to move on.These MHPs with MHPPDs are untreatable.LOL.I’m thinking of expanding on that category, and maybe writing an entire DSMMHPMDs.

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  2. Mark

    The first time I looked at TMA’s MHPPD writing it went over my head, but in reading it again now ,it is really applicable to MHP’s.

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  3. Mark

    The first time I looked at TMA’s MHPPD writing it went over my head, but in reading it again now ,it is really applicable to MHP’s.

    Like

  4. Marissa Miller

    “I’m scared of her as I have that people-pleasing problem with people in authority–something that served me very badly in the use of psychiatry historically.”

    I have an incredible problem with that myself. I should get another psych, but the people-pleaser in me doesn’t want to hurt his feelings. *sigh* It’s probably the root cause of a lot of problems.

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  5. Marissa Miller

    “I’m scared of her as I have that people-pleasing problem with people in authority–something that served me very badly in the use of psychiatry historically.”

    I have an incredible problem with that myself. I should get another psych, but the people-pleaser in me doesn’t want to hurt his feelings. *sigh* It’s probably the root cause of a lot of problems.

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  6. Gianna

    I’m not afraid of hurting her feelings…I’m afraid of incurring her wrath! Yes, a bit of healthy paranoia.

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  7. Gianna

    I’m not afraid of hurting her feelings…I’m afraid of incurring her wrath! Yes, a bit of healthy paranoia.

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  8. Marissa Miller

    And those are the moments when we’re supposed to go: “What’s the worst that can happen?”

    And I think, “They get mad! I don’t like people being mad at me!!”

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