As many of you know my dearest brother died on September 3rd of last year. Tomorrow would have been his 49th birthday. I’ve been anticipating the pain for awhile, and unfortunately what makes it hurt even worse is that today is my wedding anniversary. I have the two dates linked in my mind and have since the day I was married. I hate that the two dates are associated now.
Dear Robert, I love you. I miss you. You always believed in me when everyone else thought I was a lost cause. You instead saw courage in me and stubborn optimism. No one had ever thought to call me anything but pessimistic. You saw my refusal to give up and called it optimism. You gave me hope with your ability to see past the superficial.
So you see, you planted seeds in me. Seeds that have served me my whole life and will continue to serve me. You saw in me what no one else did and you helped me see it too.
I need my brother now. And he is still with me even though I am not religious he is alive in me. I don’t know if he is alive anywhere else but, Robert, if you’re out there I love you more than ever and I will love you always.