In response to the Mother’s Act Legislation—a piece of satire

From one of my email groups with permission I’m reprinting:

I was so pleased to see Congress begin to do something effective about the human condition. This is what I hope is the first step towards creating an intrauterine IV that can start newborn fetuses on anti-depressants after their first trimester. If we then equip these with a special computer chip it will be able to send a signal to the local drugstore to have meds quickly refilled without any fuss so mother can relax and not be disturbed.Just think of it..we can avoid the loss of sleep from teething babies who only disrupt the peace of the family. Then we won’t ever have to deal with the terrible two’s ever again as children will be so mellow from their meds they will just lay there and not create any trouble. This could probably save the economy billions as we won’t have to child proof a house any more as they will be so obedient and lethargic they wouldn’t have the strength or desire to even open a cabinet door. By the time they reach puberty all their sexual desires will have been thwarted so all that teenage angst will be gone and the billions spent on teenage pregnancies will let the fundamentalists be able to celebrate the effectiveness of their abstinence programs. All this of course will easily end our population growth problem which in turn will reduce carbon emissions and save the planet from global warming.

Meanwhile all of us in the know will be smart enough to take whatever money we have left from our 401K’s and foreclosure sales to buy Big Pharm stocks so we can all get rich and move to Fiji,With everyone on medications all psychological dysfunction will go the way of the dinosaur.My god, the more I contemplate this the more more I want to hug the author of this legislation. …and thank him for saving our planet and curing the ills of the human race. Please tell me their address so I can contribute all I have left from my last unemployment check or at least fill an envelop with some powdered substance I found in the anti-terrorist toxic waste dump. Can anyone mail me a stamp?

written by:
Brian Sheen
Executive Director
Florida Institute of Complementary and Alternative Medicine
The Quantum Healing Center
Founder of Educate, Don’t Medicate Program

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