I get information and data about the living whole in every moment of my mindful existence. Sometimes I utilize systems, ideologies, religions, metaphor and/or myth, poetry, art of all kinds and science too. All manner of creativity and human productivity are expressions of the collective whole and thus a source of information and greater connection. I do not attach to any of it (not for long anyway). There is no one source of truth or light. It is everywhere and always.
***
nothing ever turns out the way I expected…so it truly makes sense to abandon all expectations…transformational healing is downright astonishing…there is very little one can actually predict or understand…surrendering is like that
***
The rejected shadow child:
I am not worthy
I deserve nothing
I crave forgiveness
Please forgive me
But it will never be enough to redeem me
I am unredeemable
I am wrong
I am false
I am wicked
I am only concerned with myself
I cannot love
I am fear
I am rejection
I am pain and misery
I am your mother
I am your father
I am all of humanity
I am your soul
I am all that is
And all that ever was
I am
Hear me cry
This is my dark and lovely message
Hear me cry
Hear me cry
Never stop hearing me cry
I am close to your heart always
I am your heart
The tender rejected child
You cannot love without me
I am everything that needs loving in the world
I am every darkness
Every pain
Every misunderstanding
I am all that needs Illumination
I am nothing but the opposite of Illumination
In hearing my cry I am Illuminated
Hear my cry, hear my cry
Illuminate me
***
My somatic experience presents me with koans daily.
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