Some good news, some disheartening news…

After a life of excruciating pain whenever I menstruated I have found an acupuncturist who has apparently healed me. After two weeks of acupuncture last month I had virtually no pain and didn’t even think it might be the acupuncturist. I simply thought it was some sort of odd reprieve. But when I saw her the following time she told me that when she deals with hormonal issues and endometriosis that the pain is the easiest thing to relieve. The hormonal insanity and infertility take a little longer.

Well, I am now in my second month of having a pain free menstruation. It’s really mind-boggling. I’m talking horrible, laying in the fetal position and squirming about pain. Pain for which I’ve never found any pain-reliever that helped all that much. I ended up simply using Ibuprofen because all the other ones not only didn’t work but made me sick in various ways. Ibuprofen makes me sick too. I get incredibly spacey on it when I’m taking the maximum 800 mg dose every 6 hours around the clock. I don’t even need that now!! Anyway, the acupuncturist says that it might come and go for a while, but two months pain free is beyond anything I would have ever expected.

You know they tend to treat Endometriosis with about as much finesse as they treat psychiatric problems. They use drugs that make people profoundly ill. I learned 25 years ago that I would not take any of the hormonal drugs that they use to treat it. So instead I’ve had surgery twice. Surgery is not an option now as I would not tolerate anesthesia so I went to the acupuncturist as a last resort. Hallelujah!!

I have to say, though, my diet which is stellar is also a good diet for endometriosis. I bet that if I wasn’t on this diet I’m on I wouldn’t have these results. I am a member of a endometriosis yahoo group on natural treatment and holistic healing and it just so happens my mental health diet for withdrawal is pretty much the same as the endo diet…I think it’s simply called a HEALTHY DIET!!! Helps with all that ails you!!

Oh, and get this, I got my cholesterol tested the other day and I WAS NOT fasting. And it was still only 184. It used to be about 220. I don’t watch my cholesterol intake at all. I watch my CARBOHYDRATE intake!! I eat no sugar, no refined grains or refined foods in general,  and just a small amount of whole grains. This has been proven to be more effective than cutting out cholesterol. Too many sugars and carbs raise cholesterol. Cholesterol is not what makes you have bad cholesterol…it’s a myth and my body proves it, though I realize it’s just a anecdote. Anyway there is plenty out there written about the cholesterol myth…go have at it with google. Oh, also, importantly, it’s not so bad to have moderately high cholesterol…like 220 is still not unsafe…but they start pushing statins on you when you are just over 200 and statins are potentially also very dangerous drugs. I’ve read studies done in Europe where they found moderately high levels of cholesterol in women my age and older were actually protective. But pharma won’t have you learn about that if they can help it.

It is important to eat all organic, hormone free meats, as well as things like butter and milk products though since otherwise they all mess further with your hormones, and hence your endometriosis. Oh, pesticide free veggies are important too as pesticides are actually xenoestrogens and mess with your hormones too!! Anyone with PMS take note.

So the disheartening news is that I found a masseuse I was really excited about because he deeply massaged my muscles and flexed my legs and arms as though they were being used. It’s a sort of Thai massage. Since I’m so weak and hardly mobile I was thrilled to have this manipulation done to my body as I figured it would help fight against atrophy. Unfortunately, after my first appointment, I stood up and my achille’s heel had been hurt. I was in severe pain for 24 hours but then it went away very quickly and completely. The masseuse struck me as very gentle so, though I called him, I made it clear I did not blame him. He told me he expected it to clear up quickly and it did.

Well, I’ve been looking forward to going back to see him on Friday, but he called today and dumped me. He told me he didn’t want to work with someone with my “condition.” I don’t know what the fuck that was supposed to mean. He also told me he couldn’t have possibly been responsible for my injury. Never mind that it didn’t hurt when I went in and it did the minute I stood up on his mat, AND he worked for like ten minutes on my feet and ankles. Like I said it was really gentle so I didn’t BLAME him in some sort of “you are incompetent”  way, but there is no doubt that the massage triggered the pain. So I figure since I told him I have a psychiatric history that he disbelieves me or finds me hysterical or something even though I was very nice to him and even said I found him to be very gentle and I thought it was very weird that I should be hurt. And I was ready to go back to him.

The only other bit of info you’re missing is that I presented myself to him in my very weak state. It was clear I was extremely unwell. I usually don’t go out when I feel that bad, but I thought he was a professional and that was what I was seeing him for. Also I explained very well, in detail, before I saw him what my “condition” was. So I don’t know what happened.

I was devastated and I cried when he rejected me.

22 thoughts on “Some good news, some disheartening news…

  1. Gianna- and Jan,
    I completely agree with Jan. Everyone will have to deal with these issues at one time or another in their lives, to some sort of degree. I can’t imagine someone saying to me, someone with your condition, I probably would punch them in the face!!!
    I am very sensitive when it comes to people saying things negative about people or myself with emotional issues. It doesn’t make you a bad person, or make you weak, in face I think we are alot stronger!!! We have to keep trucking and it’s not easy! I am glad as Jan said that you are feeling better. I have to say I’ve been lucky so far. I had a scare a year or two ago with abnormal paps, and with also what they thought was probably a cyst on my ovaries. Since than everything seems to be normal, although my last GYN that I went to, new GYN I should say, who I have to say I liked VERY much, said that he wants me to get an ultra sound done, just to be sure that there is nothing there. Which ofcourse with everything else going on I haven’t done yet, but will! Part of my anxiety makes me feel like I always have so much to do and not enough time to get it done!! I’m sure you can relate!!!


  2. Gianna:

    I am so glad that you have found this acupuncturist and your pain has decreased tremendously. I suffered for years from endo, polyps, cysts, fibroids, etc. until I finally had a hysterectomy in 2000. Knowing what I know now, I never would have gone through that, but that’s water under the bridge.

    I am also so sorry to hear about that ridiculous, assanine massage therapist! I would have cried, too, being told what you were told. What I keep thinking is that one day that person will have some experience with depression and some type of mental/emotional trauma, and then they’ll know what it’s like to be in our shoes. Life has a way of slinging emotional traumas in everyone’s life; each one of us has to deal with this on some level. I now have a friend who admits she finally understood how I was feeling about a particular situation because she found herself in the same predicament. My belief is that it is these people who really suffer by “rejecting” the chance to help us and be a part of the journey of our healing.



  3. I still have endometriosis…it doesn’t got away that fast…the pain is under control…but I’m sure I’m still infertile…

    also, I’ve had a bit of pain today, but I imagine it’s sorta like what regular menstrual pain is like…no need for pain relievers which I avoid whenever possible.


  4. Good grief, I thought a masseuse would understand that about healing. You got a work out at his hands and you felt it. Case closed. Seems simple.

    Changing gears…
    Missie, you, however, are hereby kicked out of the Endometriosis Club. And this is where you flipply respond, “Gooooood riddance.”

    (Congrats on finding something that worked for you.)


  5. yes, you’re right Mark, it’s very intimate and I was under the impression we had clicked…I’m embarrassed how wrong about him I was and it’s painful…

    He has that Zen-like peaceful spiritual energy…but you know when I think about it often those types are kinda phony, but I bought it at the time.

    we actually had a nice chat off and on through the massage…I asked him about his travels which are many and interesting, I told him about my husband, who was a buddhist monk…yeah…it felt intimate…all the more reason to feel betrayed.


  6. “I was devastated”
    Massage is an intimate therapy where I think you have to trust the massager in order to relax.
    I never had one.

    I hope you can think of it as more of a business transaction as you are paying money for it. You can find someone else who is skilled.
    First impressions are important. Once a person knows you, knows your emotional and intelectual responses in a regular meeting or conversation, then I think it is safe to tell of a history of mental illness.


  7. Gianna,
    I’m not surprised about the acupuncture, but what a bummer about the masseuse. It’s just another example of discrimination! And given how you feel, I can certainly understand why you cried! Alas…



  8. I have a friend at work (with endo and thyroid issues) who had a beautiful and strong baby girl even when the docs had told her she only had an 8% chance. She was about to start on injections and all that stuff….. and a week before whan she was just waiting for her period…. it didn’t came at all….


  9. Good to hear about your acupuncture-success! I’ve always only experienced the very “normal” pain and cramps, that a single dose of ibuprofen can take care of. And still each time I thought, I’d gonna die… until the ibuprofen kicked in, that is. I can’t even imagine, what you’ve gone through.

    The massage-therapist – I don’t know, maybe he’s inexperienced. I’ve heard of other types of alternative healers and meditation groups and stuff, that don’t accept “mental patients”. I find this somehow double-standard. Especially since my personal view of “mental illness” very much includes spiritual aspects at least as being part of the problem. And just as especially when it’s the self-appointed “enlightened” ones, who dump people because of possible “drama”. As if “drama” never could happen as long as a person has no label. But I guess, all in all, we have to thank Big Pharma and Big Psy, once again, for also confusing some of the alternative healers with their message about brain diseases.


  10. hi Carol,
    it’s great to see you here!

    the thing is I wasn’t even seeking mental health care…I was seeking care for my body…

    it shouldn’t have played a part at all…

    but I think withonebreath tagged it exactly…he was afraid of me…

    and you are right in that people discriminate in horrible ways…it just hasn’t happened to me in almost two decades!!

    health professionals generally like me and I generally have good radar about who I can tell my story to….

    my radar failed me this time…


  11. withonebreath…you were held up in moderation…so I get to you out of order:

    what a breath of fresh air you are…you completely get why I felt so bad. I’ve been a clinician as well and I know his dismissal was precisely what you say it was…I was one of “those” difficult clients…

    and I’m not … at all…

    it’s insulting when it happens to you in any case, but being that I was in the profession myself I know what’s going on both as the client and having witnessed coworkers doing similar crap to people who often did not deserve it…

    your blog looks great! will spend more time checking it out…


  12. Your intention was pure to just inform him…not blame him. We can’t be responsible for others reactions but I understand your disappointment. You are probably correct in your assessment. He got scared. It’s too bad we can’t be straight forward about seeking mental health care. But the truth is… many will discriminate if they know.


  13. Susan,
    my acupuncturist is a gynecological acupuncturist… maybe you can look for someone with similar experience…

    also she’s extremely intuitive….

    one of her teachers is this lady:

    Maybe you can find someone trained in the “Fertile Soul” modality too….as they are experts in female hormones…

    she, of course, has a regular degree in chinese medicine and acupuncture as well….


  14. thanks for sharing. i’m going to pass this on to my girlfriend who has been considering acupuncture for the same reason. i’m glad you were able to find comfort!

    your massage therapist did sound pretty inexperienced from the way he handled the situation. having worked around therapists before, i can imagine that he didn’t want “drama”, which is what i think he meant by saying “your condition”. i’ve heard therapists exchange horror stories about “those” patients who they perceive as demanding, or overly sensitive, or what have you.

    sad, but don’t let it keep you down. he just demonstrated that HE wasn’t the one who is supposed to help you. let him go fondle his own ineptitude and try to remember the reason he became a therapist in the first place … hopefully to help people.


  15. Sweet Gianna,

    You are an inspiration. My gynocologist wants to do a D and C for this. I will try accupuncture instead. Sounds better.


  16. Gianna,

    How wonderful that acupuncture is working so well for you. I have found both acupuncture and chinese medicine in general to be amazing and quite intuitive compared to our western medical model that can be clunky at times.

    Yay for the diet and great cholesterol reading. I have to look at your archives and remind myself of your diet.

    I am very sorry about the massage therapist. He sounds like he is fairly insecure in his career or he would have handled the issue with much more understanding, grace and professionalism. Or, maybe he is just one of those people that takes things too personally and could not deal with the fact that you left in pain.
    Either way, it sounds like you did all you could to forewarn him and reassure him that you did not blame him. If you were willing to call him again, you would think he would take that as a cue to the fact that you seriously didn’t blame him.

    Hopefully you can find another massage therapist that is even better.

    Sending you best wishes,


  17. It’s great to catch up with you again, Gianna!

    Hope you do manage to keep your blog going, if only on a low simmer, It’s really helpful to lots of people. I guess you would give it a different slant.. once your own withdrawal is done… I’m being selfish here though!


  18. Hey Sloopy!
    good to see you…it’s been too long…

    yes I have a couple of friends with parents whose muscles were permanently damaged by statins…

    the shame is that they convince you the risk is worth it when it’s all a hoax…

    it’s true that cholesterol can get dangerously high, but that tends to be a genetic problem and then perhaps drugs are worth it…

    but for most of us cholesterol is just not a big deal.


  19. Statin drugs totally screwed up my mum. She suffered excrutiating muscle pain while she was on holiday overseas. She was basically bed-ridden in the hotel for the whole time. The pain didn’t leave her for months. She was worried sick that the damage was permanent.

    On her return she went straight to her family doctor who claimed the pain had nothing to do with the statins, or that she was exaggerating it. He sent her off for blood tests and was very pleased when the results came back negative – no statin damage. His treatment vindicated!

    She since discovered that blood tests are not remotely conclusive. Even invasive tissue biopsies don’t necessarily show statin-caused muscle damage.

    The docs kept telling her she needed statins, and to try out different drugs until one suited. She refused and finally persuaded the docs she neither needs nor wants statins. They think she’s crazy – after all, these are the new “wonder drugs” with a safety record close to 100%, or so the drug reps have conditioned us into believing.

    They must use a different measure of cholesterol levels here in Europe. They talk about 5.0 being the borderline for an acceptable cholesterol level.

    IIRC, she has managed to get hers down to about 4.5 with exercise and a better diet with food supplements containing plant stanols and sterols.

    The last I heard is that cholesterol plays an important role in healthy brain function. It might actually prevent degenerative organic brain diseases like Alzheimer’s. If so, it would be dangerous to cut it out.

    Still, in the dueness of time, I expect Big Pharma will offer a maintenance treatment for Alzheimer’s Disease, too.

    The entire drug industry suffers from Munchausen’s by Proxy…… it creates diseases in order to treat them (for great profit..)


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