Dear psychiatrist 2: benzos and brain damage

Dear psychiatrist 2: benzos and brain damage ~~ Update 2016: Someone called my attention to this post today so I gave it a look and thought I’d share and make a few comments. First of all THE BRAIN HEALS and we can and do get better. I’ve have many improvements and I continue to heal. So, it’s important to know that yes, the brain does get injured and it’s also important to know that  we really do heal. 

From 2010…a time in which I certainly did not always think I would get better:

Hi folks. I can’t for the most part do this blog anymore but it’s clear I have not stopped my activism either…I’m simply moving into different circles and needing a break from the daily onslaught. I’ve written to my doctor again. I’m not particularly better in many ways. While I continue to rehab physically in some ways, in others I seem to worsen. It’s hell.

There is no other way to describe it as much as many would like me and others to sugar coat the illness that can happen. I’m not depressed. I am, however, devastated. And I’m grossly physically ill. “Courage” does not always look the way people wish it to in serious chronic illness. Most people are truly simply not interested in what happens to us. It’s just too damn frightening to truly face the fragility of what is at the foundation of all our human lives and that is the fact that we do not control much of anything and we all die.

If you’re interested in the other correspondence — Letters to my shrink the dear psychiatrist series

I remind you that I was drugged in this fashion well before information was accessible by internet. I always had questions and looked for answers. They were not available at the time.

to my prescribing doctor:

J,
I’m awake at 4:27 am in excruciating physical pain right now thinking of you and your inability to take some responsibility for what has happened to me.

Do you not remember how many times I asked you…how many times I expressed my concern about the addictive nature of benzodiazepines alone? I’m not including the numerous times I inquired about long-term use of the rest of the cocktail.

How do you dismiss my situation? Have you convinced yourself this is a psychiatric issue and not brain injury? I have a doctor who works with this and he’s told me otherwise:

This is a brain injury situation (the article below also support this hypothesis)

I’m sorry you can’t own your part in this because on a very selfish level it would help me heal…I have cared about you throughout this never believing you would intentionally harm and defending you to others from that place…but I’m sorrier that you are, now apparently deluded and most likely hurting others…that is what really pains me. All I do now is to help others and I cannot pretend our relationship did not harm me. Forgiveness does not require forgetting. Abuses need to be addressed. The fact that it was unintentional actually makes it all the more important to address.

and now it enters a realm of if you continue to prescribe like you did with me you are knowingly destroying people’s futures…for what appears to you as peace in the moment.

I have cut and pasted the last article coming out of the UK media, who are light years ahead of the US in reporting on this tragedy in benzos in particular…the fact that all the psychotropics have potentially godawful consequences isn’t so widely known even there just yet, though there is better scholarship on that in general too in the UK. Since you didn’t mention benzos in your last very brief email I thought perhaps I should enlighten you.

I also suggest you look at my benzo page if you are actually giving a damn but too frightened to let me know. I realize you may never give me the peace of mind to know I’ve helped you realize what happens to a good number of people on these drugs that I have perhaps contributed to changing the way you prescribe.

My benzo page for extensive info on benzodiazepine damage and methods for safer withdrawal.

from the Independent:

Drugs linked to brain damage 30 years ago

There are lots of comments at this article if you’re interested click the above link

Remember we really do heal … visit the it gets better collection and The Brain’s Way of Healing: Discoveries from Frontiers of Neuroplasticity      

THE BRAIN HEALS – healing brain category

Letters to my shrink the dear psychiatrist series

*Please be sure to be well educated before undertaking any sort of discontinuation of medications. See: Psychiatric drug withdrawal and protracted withdrawal syndrome round-up

For more info specifically about benzodiazepines see: Benzodiazepine info, news, resources and recovery stories

For a multitude of ideas about how to create a life filled with safe alternatives to psychiatric drugs visit the drop-down menus at the top of this page.  

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