Checking in—been out of commission

I’ve been out of commission the last 48 hours or so. I may be coming around again since I’m actually writing this, but the blog has had to be neglected. I may or may not be back at it in the next couple of days. I do have a wonderful article written by a friend to post but I need to get it in a different format before I can use it.

I did a ton of posting over the holidays so look back if you were gone over the holidays. You might have missed something. I had a record month in December with 65 posts.

I’m now thinking I need to consult a neurologist. I’ve had nights where I basically convulse for a few hours. They are not true seizures as I’m conscious, but my body jerks around. That and lots of other bizarre bodily sensations some which are easy to describe like nausea and migraine and back pain and others that simply have no lexicon because it’s just plain unnatural caused by neuro toxins.

I’m scared.

I’m thinking about getting a wheelchair so I can get pushed around and see a little more besides the grocery store and an occasional restaurant. Yeah, I’m that debilitated. I literally cannot be on my feet more than about 10 minutes now. And often even sitting upright is too much energy expenditure.

Anyway the last two days I’ve been bedridden to the point where I’m not even well enough to type—basically just curled up in a ball of physical distress. Maybe I’ll be back at it tomorrow. I don’t know. I started coming out of it at about 10 pm tonight and now I’m going to bed. It’s 2:30 am. We’ll see. These bad spells really scare the shit out of me.

7 thoughts on “Checking in—been out of commission

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  1. Gianna,

    I’m sorry….didn’t see this post until just now…

    To hear that you’re “scared”….is hard to hear, but I know (from my own experience) that this is the psych drug withdrawal….

    Dangerous, mind-altering substances doing their number….

    Walk through the fear….as tough as it is….Feel the fear, but not let your spirit be fearful.

    You’re tough, and you’re also loved – by many….you have your husband, and many friends….

    I’m no spiritual guru, but if I’ve learned one spiritual thing in my life it’s that love gets us through fears.

    Stay strong,


  2. Gianna:

    I am so very glad you have Daniel there as support and, based on what you’ve shared, a loving and wonderful husband. I know my agony is not exactly the same as yours, and I am able to get out of bed and even go to work, but I totally can commiserate with the ups and downs and knowing it will be a long time before my body heals, too. I’ve had relief since taking a break from the Cell Food. Have to give it a fair chance and try it again. I was about insane while on it. Anyway, keep us posted on how you are doing and any marginal progress you’ve made. I think everyone hear wants to see you and each other heal.

  3. Dano,
    I didn’t like the piece you linked to…I made no assumptions about you as a person in general based on that link…don’t worry…

    you are very kind to offer your support…I will keep it in mind.

    I’m marginally better, but I think it will be a long time before my body heals…and the ups and downs are all on the down spectrum…

    it’s okay…it will be okay…

  4. Sweetie,

    This is so terrible. I would love to help you in any way possible. My number is (215)923-6044. Please feel free to ring, it is my cel and I will pick up unless I’m on another line or driving. Enjoying sex will not be a reason to ignore a caller. I may very well be a virgin again.

    Hon, I’m sorry if the Jenny! story upset you. She has always struck me as a confident woman, able to laugh at herself. For the blog I linked to, the man is a NYC medic. Trust me when I say the Philly guys are a tough crowd.

    May we kiss and make up? Should I remove the award? Please let me know. But even more important, let me know how you are.

    All emoticons, smilies and hearts! D

  5. thanks susan and Jan,
    I think this post made people uncomfortable…but hell…I’m pretty damn uncomfortable..thanks for giving me such kind feedback.

    I am marginally better today Jan…at least I’ve been able to do my work online. But getting on my feet…well…that’s not going to happen any time soon most likely…

    I will keep on marching along…there is really no other choice.

  6. Gianna:

    I’m so sorry you have to go through this. I also wish I had a magic pill or wand or anything to make this go away YESTERDAY. You are truly amazing in what you push through to do for so many, and you do have to take care of yourself. I hope the next time you reply you have improved, even if it’s by the slightest amount, and that it continues from there. I hope this hell you are going through now turns into endless joy and energy in the end!

  7. Oh Sweetie,

    I feel so bad for you. I wish I had a magic pill or a magic anything to take all the pain away from you and help you back on your recovery.

    You do so much for us here- please take a few days off and take care of Gianna.

    We love you.

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