integrating the ugly

integrating the ugly. —

If you want to beat yourself up when you “slip into old habits” go for it, but I suggest you learn to be kind to yourself instead. When you find that you can do that ~~ go for deeply mindful instead of beating yourself up…see what the parts of you that wanted that food, drug, behavior or whatever really want. Sink into the emotional aspects of eating, drinking or “behaving” in less than ideal ways. It’s possible to heal young injured parts that way.

See: more on parts and subpersonalities)

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Having an agenda is a violence against the moment.

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We are drawn to the disingenuousness in others that we might see it in ourselves

Unfortunately more often than not we get drawn into rabbit holes that may last years when we allow others to influence us — this is the nature of conditioning. It is all we know.

And then one day in flow nothing is sticky anymore….

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The perpetrating healer should be an archetype that’s routinely discussed in circles of any kind of helping professional. The abuses of the perpetrating healer become more and more subtle and (even) sophisticated as the healer becomes more aware… it’s an ugly razor’s edge…

I have the dubious distinction of bringing out the perpetrating healer in almost everyone I dare to approach with vulnerability.

luckily for me there have been a few notable and wondrous exceptions to that rule…and as I come into clarity it’s becoming the norm, finally

hence I’ve been able to bring through this unpopular teaching of sorts. it’s certainly not something I consciously chose…the further I move along this trajectory- fewer professionals are able to follow, appreciate or show interest in what I’m saying…

it’s going democratic…to the people…we are skipping the guru, the teacher, the paid healer…we are forming communities and healing each other free from the binds of capitalism.

• the mental health professionals who perpetrate against us
• Psychiatry ignores trauma says Dr. Bessel van der Kolk (The Body Keeps the Score)
• Professional denial is a form of retraumatization 

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Integrate that which we consider ugly. Dare to look into the shadow. In so doing it is illuminated. In so doing we heal.

More on the SHADOW aspects of being human

 

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