Personal reaction to amazing recovery rates in Finland (and those who’ve not been so lucky) and another email to my psychiatrist

This post is in response to an earlier one today. If you’ve not read it, go here.

Larry at Hopeworks community shared a link to the below post on the phenomenal success of the Western Lapland area Finnish psychiatric hospital. People get better and do not need to be on toxic medications nor institutionalized for the rest of their lives. He sent me this post he wrote in response to Daniel Mackler’s article on his blog Hopework’s Community. He, like me, has seen so much destruction caused by psychiatric drugs it’s sometimes hard to contain rage. I actually sent a note to my psychiatrist again last night when the article on Open Dialogue posted. I was very angry when I sent it. It’s perhaps the nastiest thing I’ve sent my prescribing psychiatrist who I regularly correspond with. I have often shared my correspondence on this blog. The posts are here.

What I said to Larry this morning after he shared the post about his own rage and the destruction he has seen brought about by psychiatric drugs is below. I’ve made some edits.

The reason that post about Open Dialogue got written is because when Daniel told me on the phone about the long time residents there…I knew they were my people. When I worked as a professional with the so-called “seriously mentally ill” many of whom had also been institutionalized, I never met a single one of them that took nearly as many drugs as my doctor had me on…

That’s right in addition to being prescribed doses of neuroleptics (anti-psychotics) that far exceeded what any of my clients were on, I was generally on 3, 4 and 5 more drugs than they were on!!

These folks in Finland after decades on the drugs (like myself) attempted to get off the drugs and found they couldn’t…I imagine that as soon as they started having anything resembling the kind of physical disability and acute autonomic nervous system dysfuntion issues I have they were put back on meds…no institution would be in a position to care for a house full of people in my condition. Especially at the height of it all when I was completely bedridden for more than a year.

This fact made me sob after I got off the phone with Daniel and so I went back to him wanting to spread this news far and wide that others not end up in my situation and the situation of all those “mental patients” who are now neurologically damaged and truly destined for life on those meds now.

I remain lucky because I do have my mind, spirit and passion back and I now have the time, due to a loving and patient partner to find out if I will heal…something the folks who are institutionalized in Finland will never be able to find out. Something most people drugged for decades anywhere in the world will never be able to find out.

I sent this email to my doctor. Last night I didn’t have it in me to stay calm as I usually do with him. Sometimes I can’t be nice anymore…as I lay there at 1 am awake after only 3 hours of sleep in a variety of bizarre pains…

Dear Doctor:

This is for you to read…

Finnish Open Dialogue: High recovery rates leave many psychiatric beds empty

seems to me that if there is a chance in hell that what Daniel says is true…and since it’s WELL documented…well…it’s true…

every honest shrink should find up what the hell is up…really…sometimes it’s hard to fathom how you people cling to a sick, broken, criminal system. Why is the only thing I want to know…??

this sort of news should be greeted with celebration and the quest to learn how to actually heal the people the system has been hurting for so many decades.

(for more correspondence with my shrink see here)

I’ve pieced this post together with emails I wrote today. I will end with bits and pieces of an email I sent to someone with the latest reports of  the chemical injury symptoms. For a more complete list of all the long laundry list of shit I experience everyday see here.

For now I shared the below notes with an interested and friendly doctor the other day…it includes my progress, which is slow and painful, but undeniable.

Chest pain, heart palps, constriction in the chest, terror felt in the body (often not in my mind at all, indicating autonomic dysfunction) severe neuropathy and severe parasthesia both all with origins in the chest area that radiate out into my body…those are the things that are toughest for me to deal with now. And they all keep me AWAKE all too often. The insomnia is downright dangerous at this time.

Also a startle response that is insane and crazy hypervigilance…again, body based, my thinking does not engage with the fear…but my bodies responses are animal and automatic.

Oh…lastly I want to say that I am getting physically stronger VERY slowly. I was 100% bedbound for about a year. I now am up everyday even on my worst days. On a good day I can walk 3 blocks and go grocery shopping briefly or out for a meal. But I didn’t have a good day for a whole month until about 3 days ago and I’m often still mostly in bed even with these improvements. I still have long periods where I revert to being housebound. And even on a good day, by late afternoon I am once again death warmed over.

I do yoga daily (very gentle routines) and try to move even when I’m mostly in bed….I work very hard if also very gently at getting well.

For the most recent full post on symptoms from the chemical injury I’ve sustained see here.

About Monica Cassani

Author/Editor Beyond Meds: Everything Matters